Tag Archive: accountability


It is fine to be zealous, provided the purpose is good, and to be so always, not just when I am with you. Galatians 4:18

Many times as an early Christian, I felt zealous; I was on fire for the Lord. Now and then, I a period of time would pass and I had been away too long from my Christian brothers, I felt a tremendous distancing from the Lord and found myself beginning to “back-slide”. I think it is important to feel this, but also to reverse its traction. One should not be away so long that the fires burn out. You must rekindle the fires forever. This is another great reason you need to attend a church and get involved with small groups. Get a mentor and/or an accountability partner.

Dearest Lord, I pray that there would never be a time too long away from the Body of Christ that I fall into the hands of the evil one. Please guide and protect my family which you have blessed me with, and entrusted to bring up to serve you in the same manner as I. In Jesus’ name I pray these. Amen

Paul’s Defense of His Ministry

I do not want to seem to be trying to frighten you with my letters. For some say, “His letters are weighty and forceful, but in person he is unimpressive and his speaking amounts to nothing.” Such people should realize that what we are in our letters when we are absent, we will be in our actions when we are present. 2 Corinthians 10:9-11

Paul’s style of writing seems down to earth. I’d say I write in the same style; plain, straight forward and real. No professional sweet-talk and legal terms. This is considered rather bold and while in the writing process you become liberal to let the words flow. Even as I speak I tend to get this way and often I have to deny some of it coming from my heart at all. This is where I filter my tongue. If this is my true heart… then I don’t want it.

Heavenly Father; I know you know my true heart. If this is not your will, I ask for you to conform it to yours. At times it doesn’t reflect the morals I have grown to love as a Christian. When in person with others I feel paper thin and fear they too see my heart, but only incorrectly. There remains some unhealthy blemishes. So Lord, I ask you to please blot them out. In Jesus’ name Lord. Amen

Stranger Here

Yes it has been weighing on me that I have not posted is a long while. Thoughts of even giving it up came to mind. I think it is the thought of needing to fill in the gap in a huge effort to catch up. That is just not going to happen tho.

I have been trying to get a raise the past couple months. Seems I may have met my challenge in proving my worthiness. Also just that thought of having to prove myself may not be the point and that my boss may have a different idea of what I am worth to him. IMHO, he doesn’t reward based on your efforts but by your loyalty and social status. May be a sad mis-diagnosis of a fellow Christian… I know. However I will not stand down without a stiff answer. Seems as if business has kept us from meeting since my initial inquiry. That and the lack of courage and preparedness. So I suck! :P

I’m hoping that we will once and forever lose Made2Manage. The latest stunt is a stiff price for doing our customization. Somewhere about $67k and the kicker is the no liability warranty sticker to go with it! For just a bit more… $87k we can go with a much better IMO, ERP package called Abas. This includes our training, customization, setup, installation, and product. This is a German company and has thoroughly impressed me. Problem is I found this company without much effort. This may be bad based on the lack of research into other companies. My search was narrowed by Linux requirements tho. The next bet was an OpenSource project, but I just didn’t want to back it. If I had a team of supporters here in the office it would be different.

Serving at the church has been picking up too! I am now a “Small Group Connector” who finds a group for individuals looking for Community Groups or Men’s Breakfast/Mentoring groups and such. I also have been helping out with a ToolBox project with the church website. Won’t be helping too much with this as they insist on using Microsoft products. So they are mostly interested in my direction I guess. The other thing is I have been meeting with two mentors quite regularly. Doing some workgroup type studies including some memory verse practice. I also have been helping out with Wednesday evening 4th grader classes. Tonight I have them by myself as the main teacher is out of town. I’m hopping next year I will have my own class. I like the 4th grade too. Not interested in moving up with my class. Still seeking an answer from the Lord on what to do about helping out with Summer Camp next month. It is looking more and more in favor tho!

I have been working on my old hard drive once again. I had been playing with some new partitioning tools from various CDs and ended up using the old standby fdisk for Linux. The trouble had been creating the same partitioning scheme I had written down at the time it was working. I have since figured out how to do this but also figured out a more damaging concept that may be the last straw… c/h/s. Cylinder/Heads/Sectors geometry. Seems I even documented this in the working stage before I doused it. What I wrote down was not the manufacture geometry shown on this drive. So I assume the geometry was changed about three times in the midst of all this. Testing on the documented and recommended geometries didn’t work. What doesn’t work is that I can’t mount the drive. It won’t recognize the system file type. This has not been formatted since either so there may be some extra levels I just don’t comprehend about it needing it. IMO that would be the last straw… in a sense wiping the drive.

This week I have tightened the noose on the spammers. I have been building a blacklisted.rules file that is now up to about 200 IPs and networks that have been blacklisted. With the rampant viruses and spyware out, this is a difficult task. Mutation through the networks seems to be never ending.

The Pain of Conviction

The Men’s Mentoring Ministry meeting went off last night. Got out about 10PM. Made for a long evening spent at the church with the normal Wednesday night service before that. I mentioned what I guessed the meeting would be like yesterday. I wasn’t too far off! What I feared most was that we’d all be lined up and those in the known click crowd would be team members and hand pick from those on the wall for teammates. But as I had guessed it… the place was packed with very ambitious guys wanting to disciple and mentor. That is awesome you know! A rather large number on hand were very open about speaking out and even against some ideas. Today I (as one who didn’t speak up) emailed the leader of the ministry my thoughts and suggestions. As I am already a part of a couple mentoring groups wasn’t looking for more ppl. I wanted more resource information and training opportunities. The outcome of this meeting has possibly opened my accountability partners eyes to a real need for commitment in getting together. We both suffer sins of the flesh yet need mentors ourselves.

The home PC is still not working in Windows. I had gone into safe mode and removed the hotfix driver and the hardware device listing. Again… in normal mode it detected the device and installs it. Up to the install everything runs fine, but after it’s installed it crawls again. Checking the BIOS I only have the option of PCI or AGP as the video selection. Oddly I did notice the on-board NIC was enabled which I changed, as well as sound was disabled!?! Sound was never a problem however and to the best of my knowledge the change made no difference. So I’m running out of plans. I guess next I just need to go with the flow. You know… “can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em”. Well I will try deleting the Matrox driver and keep the Intel installed or just dump them both. Then try reinstalling the Matrox drivers later. Currently the display properties do show that it is using the Matrox drivers. My guess is that a shared library got overwritten.

Got some progress out of the QC wireless today! Found a driver and firmware update available. The new config utility works great and easier to get around in. Only one problem and that is it’s a bit slower in bringing up the network. But hey, it beats having to set the WEP password every boot.

This week must have had a hex put over the DLT tape backup unit. Friday one workstation was turned off by mistake. Monday the boss turned his PC off. Tuesday had a tape failure. Wednesday I accidentally left the tape cleaner in the drive. However I was able to remember that type of error will start the job the moment it gets a writable tape and so I had the correct tape in for Wednesday. Tonight will prove the broken spell. I should ping the bosses PC since he left on vacation…

Yet another virus out this afternoon! ClamAV calls it Worm.SomeFool, Symantec coins it W32.Netsky.B@mm. So far we have had only four.

This afternoon I offered a suggestion to the church IT manager. Currently the sermons online are in the RealAudio format. It is also packaged as a streaming method. I mentioned that several ppl have asked me how to download them. This proves to be a much larger task for them than they expected. View the ram file for the actual URL and wget the ra file to your disk. Then I run a vplayer command that plays it through RealAudio to a wav file, then I use that to burn an audio CD. What’s so hard about that? :D So I suggested offering a couple quality versions of a mp3 format. He took the bate! So now he wants me to draw up a plan for the transition. We don’t want to scare the folks already used to this system at hand. Cool, then we could measure the stats to see what ppl like. Now if I could figure how to incorporate using Linux to do this from home. Time to think about this now.

More Hodge Podge Topics

Not a good start this morning. Didn’t even finish shaving this morning before my computer trouble found me! Kassie had trouble booting up the home PC. We have a Dell 2350 with a 15″ flat panel and a add in NIC and add in graphics card. Sometimes that on-board stuff is just crap! The on-board video couldn’t handle high end colors and resolution even in Windows. The on-board NIC kept freaking out in Linux causing me to restart the network to repair. All that got very tiring. So I looked at the Windows updates manually last night and saw a video driver was available. Installed and reboot… into Linux then and wrote yesterdays post and shutdown for the evening. So this morning as Kassie boots up, Windows sat at a black screen. I remove the driver in safe mode but upon entering normal mode again it reinstalled and instantly brought the PC to a crawl. 10 to 8AM and I just couldn’t wait to fix it. So no games for the kids today. However Linux is running just fine. Kassie hadn’t been in her profile for quite some time now. But I did see she had done some emailings. So this evening maybe I can get to that turtle and rip out the hotfix. If not then I’ll have to just reinstall the other drivers once again to override it.

Today at work… The banner ad cleanup seems to be working fair. Nobody has come complaining to me yet. I have seen a few blank spots on pages where the ad should have been but some of these folks need about a week to figure that something was wrong.

Looks like I’m going to get bumped down to #9 in the Gallery forum. Paour is firing off messages like a mad man! He has just released a major release for the Gallery Remote and of course, the trouble tickets come roaring in. I haven’t been in that arena for a bit. My last glitches were proven to be too much for me to debug with him.

I got on an online chat panel with Linksys this afternoon. Trying to troubleshoot the dang wireless access point. This gal didn’t provide a lick of knowledge on the the topic. All she could offer is restart the AP. Or can you ping it? I ended up changing it to use no WEP and it works. I did find that the authentication method had to be set to “both” as in open and (I assume) shared. Seems setting it to either one of those would not work. In that event of turning off WEP I had to re-enter the new keys and noticed key one was different. I should have known. Some how it was buggered up and that was probably it. But as usual around here… nothing ever goes without something else breaking. The QC dept. PC now connects to the secure AP but not after a reboot. So in attempts to go back to the insecure AP I can not get it to connect there at all now. I wrote a note to leave the PC powered one with it working on the secure network. Another priority job to tackle I guess.

The boss is leaving again tomorrow so I need to sync up his “My Documents”. This proves to be a slow and tedious task. I tried using rsync but then I would need to mount both PC’s and that proved to be another stumbling block. Cant seem to mount the damn XP laptop! I’m sure I had this idea once before, but I don’t recall what part I stumbled on. Transferring via MS Networking between XP and 2000 also proves to be tedious. Seems MS had a patch that screwed up network performance.

I just might not get to the home PC. I have church this evening and then a mens mentoring meeting afterword. That should be odd. Guys can’t do much before the comfort level increases. I have a feeling the place will be packed with guys who want to mentor rather be mentored. Well we all need some level of mentoring… it’s just a matter of pride I guess.

A Weeks Worth

What a busy week! Just now got a chance to begin posting this weeks goings on. On Monday I got the call to fix the CNC shop server. Coincidentally the power supply was discovered dead the same day Bresnan was to come in and install their Internet service. Luckily I already had a power supply from a clone of the same PC I had refurbished last year. Plus I grabbed some RAM for this. Although it only recognized half of it’s capacity, I installed 256 to get 128 out of it. Oh well… it won’t be in service too long. It only had 32MB previously, so still much farther ahead. Bresnan was amazed at what they’d have to do to get their service into the building. Being so tall and on the opposite side of it’s destination. They ended up doing what I had suggested even! Crossing the ally two times and enter through the phone conduit. They got it running and we’re happy with the speeds so far!

Tuesday through Thursday I spent troubleshooting the AS400 connection going to our second “Building B”. They manufacture shipping containers there for exporting. So they have one node over there to our main office. Coincidentally when they have trouble we have trouble with our packing slip printer. The beauty of serial networked connections. I think it’s called twin-ax? So I spent most of my time building a PC from old parts to connect the modern way. Last summer I installed a wireless connection between the buildings using two access points with boosters mounted inside PVC boxes outside both buildings. Started with putting Windows 2000 on this PII 300MHz box using a Dell by proxy. You see we only had it on a restore CD so… well we won’t get into that here okay. Anyway… plopping the HD back into the destination box and booting up, it freezes during boot up. So I figured there must have been some difference with the HD parameters between the two boxes. I then put it back into the Dell and installed Windows 98 but this time putting in in the Dell just for speed. Again back in the other box it freezes but only after some new devices are installed. I discovered something was corrupting the registery. This was fixed by removing some of the Windows updates and skipping the loading of the registry. I get into Windows and reinstall the updates. This seems to smooth out the flawed registry! You would think it was smooth sailing after this, but then I get keyboard problems. Switching keyboards doesn’t help. Some combination of removing the keyboard and booting, failing, rebooting with keyboard does the trick. BTW this is an old IBM tower. Okay so once in the Building B more troubles including boot failures, bad monitor and tight network security. Geez Louise! Needless to say I am working on a different, hopefully not so possessed PC for them. For the time being they are running.

On and off through the week I have had to attempt getting another PC for our QC dept. It has been ready for them for weeks but was just waiting for the chance for them to accept it. They have been too busy to let me set it up that is. Two troubles cropped up here. Wireless network and COM1 problems with some ancient DOS application. As of yesterday I have gotten the COM port working but now have software problems… possibly OS incompatibility. I need to call to find out and then maybe just upgrade! For now I have two wireless networks for him to choose from: one is secure and the other is open but farther away. Yeah yeah… it’s open! Working on it! So the secure AP is closer but seems that every time this exterior door opens I loose connection. Strange but also I’m not getting DHCP to move through either. Seems to be working fine for the mentioned IBM box in the Building B warehouse. For the time being it’s just using the farther but open AP.

Made2Manage sent their customization consultant Wednesday and Thursday. I feel it was a good visit. However my co heart data analyst seems to be showing truer colors now. I am suspecting she is contributing to some failure in the process of our migration. At times the boss wants to just fork out the money to get this show rolling but she consistently steps in and makes show stopping issues and then blames it on money. Next would be the training issues. These ppl have been trained over 2 and a half years ago and have had a bad experience during this training due to technical difficulties. I had a ton of training a couple summers ago and a lot has changed to that point even. My experience was rather smooth. Problem is we have some flunkies that can’t handle being in a class scenario where you have to pay attention and try to lean something new. We also have such a flexible system now that they don’t want to tie themselves down to one way of doing things. There is a pride issue at play too. Our way is the only way! What does it hurt to see how others in the industry are doing things? Then of course nobody wants to be doing it the M2M way because it’s their way and not any one way. Our ppl don’t want to learn with some bogus test company. They want to train with our own part numbers. Waah Waah! A bunch of whining basket cases. I say model with the damn test company data, learn what works and doesn’t, customize and then maybe model again with our data. It’s all very time consuming and may require hiring a consultant to model with, but we’d be moving forward. We’re into something like our third year migrating!

Tonight will be a fun one! Our babysitter finally called last night to agree to watch the kids this evening. We were wondering if she was avoiding us. Anyway our community group will be rehearsing for this weekends sermons at church. One of the pastors asked if we would do a skit for all four services. It’s probably only for the first few minutes of the services. I chose to take care of the kids early on so not to worry about what to do with them. I wanted Kassie to do the skit because she used to do this stuff in high school drama class/club. She needed to get more involved in the group anyway. She has taken care of the kids too many other times like this. Then after the rehearsal we head to our normal biweekly community group meeting. Our community group has a passion for serving. So many of us do little things for the church and community, I feel that the church picks on us to be examples. This is our second group we have joined. The first was with an older group but we were there because our mentors were apprenticing with them. They moved to Laurel and thus giving up leading a group so we needed to get with a group more of our age and with kids. We are still a bit younger than most and so are our kids but we are getting some younger. We have sort of a love/hate feeling about our group too. We hate making preparations to go but love the fact that we did go. I keep thinking it’ll get better but I really should expect it to get worse. You see Satan attacks you most when he sees that you are getting out of his grasp. How’s that for making sense? I have to share one quote from someone I chat with often. He has a major lacking of moral values and he was getting upset with me for my lack of political involvement. He wrote “I encourage you to get involved with me in politics… because I think it has more of an impact on people than a church visit every Sunday.” You draw your own conclusion. I chose to ignore what he said. At that moment I couldn’t respond while my blood pressure was cooking. The truth of the matter is that what he says may have an immediate point but my purpose is not for my future life but goes much further than that. I choose to do the things in my temporary life for eternities sake not just the here and now.

I had a nice surprise yesterday. One of my mentors called for lunch unplanned. I just so happened to be available. This week was so busy that I hadn’t had time to eat much but to work during the chow. I let him know about how I was feeling down from the previous Thursday morning with my accountability partners news. I was happy to hear that I wasn’t far off key for feeling this way. He too thought it was not a very cool thing. I’m so happy that he is always honest with giving it to me straight. I informed him about how God has been so good to us over the past couple months. Not that he never is… it’s just that we have grown to put such faith in God and he has shown faith in us.

Hey Good look’n!

Starting to wonder what I had left to wear for pants this morning. I had some slacks and a couple hand-me-downs left. I didn’t care for the gray aircraft pants or whatever you call them, so I chose the white painter style pants. Chose one of my nice blue button up shirts that I had pressed earlier this week. Get to work and right away both receptionists pay me compliments! Neither was at the same time nor were they both together at the time. They seemed genuine. Made me feel pretty good. I always thought i looked good in red. I placing bets on the white pants tho! :p

I decided to move some computer equipment into the newly empty server room. Empty by means of not occupied by an employee. It is nice to be able to spread out some work. I had to setup a PC the boss had me get for his daughter. Thought I’d better get this to her before he got back form a couple weeks stay down in South America.

So now that my M2M upgrade is out of the way I can focus a bit on why I can no longer remote into the Windows box. All those ports are being filtered by external networks. Thought it was the Cisco router but now think it may be that damn defunct 48 port switch from Dell. This thing has been a pain since it was installed. Got it primarily for the GB ports, but when enabled they run slower than a 10 base! So they are being used but tamed down to a 100 base. This problem will be the next todo on the list. So I’m going to get the old HP Pro Curve switch out and find the incoming Internet cat5 and put this switch before the Dell switch.

Seems to be a rather slow afternoon. Email is quiet and ysm msgs are down to zero today… Got the bosses PC ready, maybe it’s time to deliver. Then I need to install their HP all-in-one. That is a bit trick since it needs to be local to the PC for the install. Then I can use it over the network there.

Getting multiple community group emails today. One original and a couple minutes later the same person forwards it to what seems to be the same ppl again!?! Hmm… maybe I should get a list server going? Some ppl just don’t get email. I don’t just mean receiving them either!

Was feeling a bit down yesterday. My accountability partner informed me that he couldn’t commit to meeting anymore. He was attending a men’s camp/seminar last week and a few of them agreed to start up a accountability group. He was honest about informing me at least. Anyway I think it’s good to have an accountability partner. So for the time being I will just do some mentoring. I know of a couple guys I need to contact more often.

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